The Fear of Missing Out on Your Own Life: How FOMO Is Stealing Your Joy
Exploring how Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) goes beyond social media, affecting our personal happiness and life choices.
It’s a strange thing, FOMO. Most people think it’s about parties or Instagram (TikTok) -worthy holidays, but for me, it’s always been more existential—like I’ve been watching my own life unfold from the sidelines, wondering if I somehow missed the memo. Am I doing this right? Have I taken a wrong turn? Is everyone else out there living life better than I am?
This feeling hit even harder when I moved to Bristol nearly two years ago, leaving behind a small town in the East Midlands. For some reason, I thought the move would give me the clarity I was craving. Like I could reset myself, shake off the dust, and finally “arrive” at my life—whatever that even means.
New City, Same Questions
The first few months in Bristol felt like a blur. I was adjusting to a bigger city, the constant hum of activity, and the idea that I was now living somewhere that felt… I don’t know, more real? Like I had upgraded my life, moved closer to where things were really happening.
But after the initial excitement, the same old questions crept back in. Was this it? I had made the move, ticked off the next box on my life checklist, but nothing inside me felt any different. If anything, I felt like I had less of a grip on things than ever before. Maybe the problem wasn’t the city—maybe it was me?
FOMO, But Make It Personal
Here’s the thing: I used to think FOMO was about watching other people live the life I wanted. But lately, I’ve realized it’s less about others and more about me. It’s the fear of missing out on my own life. Like, I’ve been so focused on figuring out what “there” looks like that I’ve been missing out on here. The now. The messiness of living in the moment.
Moving to Bristol made me question everything: Did I choose the right city? The right career path? Was I doing what I was supposed to be doing at this stage of my life? In classic FOMO fashion, I kept imagining that somewhere else (or someone else’s life) was where I was supposed to be. But then I had to ask myself: what if the idea of "supposed to be" is total bullshit?
Are We Missing Out, or Just Wandering?
I used to think that if I could just find the right place, the right career, or the right rhythm in life, I’d suddenly feel grounded, like everything was falling into place. But what I’ve realized (and trust me, this realization didn’t come easy) is that maybe there is no place where everything clicks. Maybe we’re all just wandering, pretending we know what we’re doing while trying not to spill our drinks.
Since moving to Bristol, I’ve been slowly learning to embrace the not-knowing, the uncertainty that used to terrify me. Sure, there are still moments when I feel like I’ve taken a wrong turn, but I’m starting to wonder if there ever was a “right” turn in the first place. Maybe life isn’t a well-marked path with an obvious destination; maybe it’s more like wandering through a city you don’t know yet, stumbling across little gems of joy along the way—like that random coffee shop you never knew you needed.
Letting Go of the Finish Line
At some point, we all have to let go of the idea that life will ever be something we can figure out or perfect. Trust me, I’ve tried. But the more I try to map everything out, the more I realize I’m missing out on what’s happening right in front of me. So, I’m letting go of the finish line (or at least trying to) and embracing the idea that maybe life is less about arriving somewhere and more about just showing up every day.
It’s been almost two years since I moved to Bristol, and while I still don’t feel like I have everything figured out, I’ve stopped thinking that I need to. I’m learning to stop comparing my path to everyone else’s, to stop worrying that I’m not where I “should” be. Because, honestly, who decides where we should be, anyway?
A New Kind of FOMO
These days, I still get FOMO, but it’s different. It’s not about what other people are doing; it’s about not wanting to miss out on my own life while I’m busy overthinking it. It’s about letting myself wander without needing to know where I’ll end up.
So, if you’ve ever felt like you’re missing out on your own life, like you’re stuck on the sidelines waiting for something to click, know that you’re not alone. I’m right there with you, wondering where the hell “there” even is. But maybe that’s okay. Maybe the best moments come when we stop looking for the map and start embracing the unknown.
Happy Exploring.
Liv
Thanks for reading Am I There Yet?! I’m still figuring things out, but hey, aren’t we all? This post is free. Please share with friends who may be interested.
Subscribe to "Am I There Yet?" by Liv
If you’re interested in self-discovery, cultivating a growth mindset, and embracing personal development, this is the space for you. Join me as we explore the adventure of becoming the best version of ourselves!